Joke Time - Part 7

Usapang mag-ama
Ama: Ngayong tapos ka na ng high school, ano ang
kukunin mo sa kolehiyo?
Anak: Law po.
Ama: Ano?! Tapos ka na ng HIGH, babalik ka pa sa LOW?!

...

Scientific names
CUTE - ahkoyan.
TALENTED - ahkophayan.
ROMANTIC - akhopharyn-yan.
LOVABLE - akhoulityan.
ABNORMAL - ahikawnahyahn!

...

Sino ang unang tao sa mundo
Sabi ng mga HUDYO, "kami".
Bakit? Dahil kami ang nagpako sa Diyos.
Sabi ng mga INTSIK, "kami".
Bakit? Kanino kayo bili pako abel?

...
Dont Stop
MOM: Didn't I tell you that if a guy touches your
boobs say DON'T? And if he touches your @#%$ say STOP!
GIRL: Right, but he touched both at the same
time so I said, DON'T STOP!

...

Ganda spelling
Bagong salta sa America, yung Pinoy ay gustong mag-long distance sa Pilipinas kaya dinayal yung "0 for Operator".
Operator: AT&T. How may I help you?
Pinoy: Heyloow. Ay wud like to long distans da Pilipins, plis.
Operator: Name of the party you're calling?
Pinoy: Aybegyurpardon? Can you repit agen plis?
Operator: What is the name of the person you are calling?
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu and sori. Da name of my calling is Elpidio Abanquel. Sori and tenkyu.
Operator: Please spell out the name of the person you're calling phonetically.
Pinoy: Yes, tenkyu. What is foneticali?
Operator: Please spell out the letters comprising the name a letter at a time and citing a word for each letter.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Da name of Elpidio Abanquel is Elpidio Abanquel. I will spell his name foneticali. Elpidio: E as in Elpidio, L as in lpidio, p as in pidio, i as in idio, d as in dio, i as in io and o as in o.
Operator: Sir, can you please use English words.
Pinoy: Ah, yes, tenkyu. Abanquel: A as in Airport, B as in Because, A as in Airport agen, N as in... Enemy, Q as in... Cuba, U as in... Europe, E as in... Important and L as in... Elephant.